WWSFKD? #2: How do I get unstuck in my 20s?

+ 5 mindset shifts to turn rejection, confusion, and self-doubt into momentum.

Let’s be real: life isn’t linear and most of us are just doing our best to figure it the fuck out as we go. Whether you're facing a tough “no,” feeling stuck in love or work, or wondering if you're the only one who doesn't have it all together (spoiler: you're not), this one’s for you.

 

This week, I’m answering some of your most vulnerable, most real questions about rejection, career ruts, dating dry spells, confidence slumps, and the overwhelming “WTF am I doing with my life?” moments. 

Let’s get into it.

Jenna M. asked: How do you handle rejection?

SFK: You’re going to get rejected. A lot. From jobs, from friends, from weddings, from people you thought would love you back. And that’s okay. Rejection is part of life. Once you stop taking it so personally, everything gets a lot lighter.

Sometimes you’ll go on a date or walk out of an interview thinking it went amazing, and then… nothing. That doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. It just means that opportunity wasn’t for you. But your person, your job, your thing—it’s out there. You have to believe that.

And yeah, sometimes rejection doesn’t come in the form of a no. Sometimes it’s silence. Sometimes it’s people not liking a project you spent years on. I’ve been there. I’ve had people talk shit about me online, drag my work, question my choices. And yes, it hurts. But I’ve learned to tell the difference between feedback that helps me grow and feedback that’s just someone projecting their own insecurity. You have to stay open, but not absorb everything.

The worst thing you can do is stop showing up because you’re afraid of being judged. That’s how rejection wins. The only way to get over the fear is to walk straight through it. It’s exposure therapy. Keep creating. Keep applying. Keep dating. Keep putting your heart out there.

The energy you put into the world will come back. So be grateful for every no—it’s saving you from wasting time. What’s meant for you will find you. But only if you’re brave enough to stay in the game.

Sasha T. asked: My career is going better than my love life. How do I fix this?

SFK: If your career’s thriving and your love life isn’t, try changing the way you talk about each. You probably speak about your job with confidence. You trust your instincts, believe in your worth, and go after what you want. That same energy can exist in dating too. You deserve love. You just might not fully believe it yet.

Dating isn’t always romantic. A lot of the time, it’s logistics. It’s making time in your schedule, saying yes when you’d rather stay home, going on dates that might not lead to anything—just to stay open. When I was single, I started dating just to practice. Not because I was obsessed with the person, but because I wanted to show the universe I was ready.

It helped me get clear on what I didn’t want. That’s when I stopped entertaining situationships. I sat down and really figured out what I needed in a partner—emotionally, intellectually, physically. Once I knew that, it got way easier to say no to anything less.

And yes, it takes time. I was single for five years. But I kept repeating to myself, I trust the timing of my life. It wasn’t a catchphrase. It was a mindset. You’re not behind. You’re just in the middle of building something new. And you already know how to build.

Emily H. asked: I’m in my 20s and have no idea what I’m doing with my love life OR my career. What can I do?

SFK: You probably feel like everyone else knows what they’re doing and you’re the only one behind. You’re not. I just had dinner with a friend who’s pivoting her career at thirty. My mom went from being a doctor to a TV executive. Life is long. You have time. Your 20s are for going out, getting it wrong, learning what you like and what you don’t. Your first job isn’t your dream job. It’s just a step. Same with your first situationship. Instead of spiraling, get curious. Write down everything that excites you—what you could see yourself doing every day. It could be something as small as shopping online. What do you love about it? The hunt? The aesthetic? The branding? Then find someone who works in that space and ask them what their day actually looks like. Do the same for dating. Write down exactly what you want in a partner. I did this and it helped me stop settling. Getting clear on what you want is the first step to finding it.

Tatiana S. asked: What is the best advice you can give to someone starting a brand/business?

SFK: The best advice I can give is: don’t try to do it all alone. You might not be able to hire a full team right away, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find support. When I was making my TV show for Peacock, we had a super limited budget. I couldn’t afford a full crew of costume designers or composers, so I tapped people I trusted. My stylist jumped at the chance to have her first TV credit. My former assistant made the theme song. They were young, scrappy, and wanted the experience too.

There are people around you right now who want to build something just as badly as you do. Collaborate with them. Trade skills. Build your dream team from the ground up. You don’t need to do everything—you just need to start.

Charlotte D. asked: I’m in a slump and lacking confidence. How do I escape this feeling?

SFK: When I’m in a slump, I catch myself making a mental list of everything that’s going wrong. And then suddenly, everything feels wrong. It’s a spiral. So here’s what I do instead. I imagine my best friend coming to me, feeling exactly how I feel. What would I say to her?

If she told me her love life was trash, I’d remind her how amazing she is and how no man defines her worth. If she felt stuck in her job, I’d remind her that careers aren’t linear and she’s allowed to pivot. If she felt insecure about how she looked, I’d list every single thing I love about her face, her body, her energy.

You have that advice in you. You just never say it to yourself. So go to the mirror and say it out loud. Be your own best friend.

Still living at home? Tell yourself you’re saving money and getting time with your parents most people never get as adults. Want to get the fuck out of your small town? Write down the steps. Apply to one job. DM one person living the life you want. Start small but start.

You already know what to do. You just have to say it to yourself like you mean it.

Love you all SO much and see you next week!!!!

Have more questions you want me to answer? Comment them below, reply in the chat, send me a DM, or shoot an email to natalie@sfklfg.com